Bhagam Bhag - A review

Bhagam Bhag....a movie that evokes a deep sense of disgust. Kulli and I actually went to see "The History Boys" but the projector was not working...so we were told that we could watch any other movie for free. The choice was between this one and Kabul express so it was going to be a close one (on the Crappy scale) either way :-)

At this time, let me delve into some deep philosophy....please stay with me on this one. Nothing is Free.....let me tell you that again...NOTHING IS FREE!! :-)

If we didn't pay any money to watch Bhagam Bhag (and Thank God we didn't as that would have scarred me for life!), we spent...make that WASTED...2.5 hours of our valuable time sitting there.

I couldn't believe that people were laughing at some of the jokes....I mean seriously, I was on the verge of crying for seeing such a shitty movie and there were people busting out laughing! Either my existence is too jaded and I'm ready to die or some peoples' sense of humour is seriously twisted!

Paresh Rawal is a joke himself....somebody pay the man some money to shut up....he's a talented actor but I guess he gets paid like 1000 rupees per flick, so he has to work constantly to pay his bills and therefore ends up with nonsensical roles.

Govinda....makes me think of the Lord Govinda.....as in mujhe please is duniya se utha le bhagwan Govinda....juvenile at best....well past his prime and what a prime that was! :-)

Akshay....I dont even want to type anything beyond this point.

One of my many new year's resolution that I am very confident I will stick to:

I shall not see another Hindi movie ever again UNLESS it has been corroborated as worth seeing by ATLEAST two INDEPENDENT parties whose judgement I trust implicitly.

So there...final comments....please dont see the movie and with the money you save, please eat paani puri chat to guarantee enjoyment of your time and money! :-)

Saddam's out....

Didn't know that the name Saddam means 'He who Confronts'....well, he sure did a killer job of that (pun intended!). Anyway, the Iraqis made short work of him for sure....hanged him within hours of picking him up from the US custody.

Was all the trials and prison time etc,. really necessary? Sometimes, I feel that the American ideology of following "due process" seems really stupid in many cases. Spend several man years of time as well as millions of dollars of tax payer money to guard a wanton criminal, then prove him guilty and then sentence him etc,. In Saddam's case, all that was needed was a bullet in his head when he was found hiding in a hole...he had a gun on him so it would've been very easy to claim self defense...

Oh well....to each his own I guess. Will this change anything? Probably not...I guess the media can spin a couple of days worth of old video footage and try and garner some viewership....but other than that...

The dreaded annual physical!!

I had been neglecting to get it done...in like FOREVER!!!

Like my dear friend Venky says, I'm a wise old man who's not getting any younger as the years pass him by!! Finally setup an appointment with an "internal medicine" specialist...

Had to fast for 12 hours before going there so my bloodwork would be accurate! Then, when I showed up, I had to fill out forms for 25 minutes (and that too writing at a FURIOUS pace!). Man, no wonder I'd been putting it off all these years! :-)

I was whisked into the good Doctor's chambers....pretty young chap, a Dr. Agarwal. Went into family history and all that jazz, checked BP, weight etc,. and declared that from a BMI standpoint, I was perfectly where I needed to be. Sometimes, I wonder about the BMI calculation - I dont think it is a good enough Indicator of overall health. I consider it nothing more than the most basic rudimentary measure....but I digress!

Coming to the interesting part - I had been warned by my colleagues at work (yeah, we discuss things like this in gory detail) about the dreaded DIGITAL Exam...that had NOTHING whatsoever to do with the digital world or numbers, if you catch my drift!! ;-)
I was pretty hesitant to bring it up initially...for obvious reasons!

Once he'd completed the blood draw, he declared flatly (as in with no emotion) that he wanted to check my test tickles (please to read fastly please!). I knew that my time had come...where I would face my enemy bravely to the death! In reality, it was a quick drop my pants, nudge nudge, Chassis OK!, transmission OK!, feel feel, Check Engine Light OFF!, All Systems OK!, pull my pants up and DONE!!
WAHOOOOOOOOOO!!!! I did it!! I am DA MAN!!! :-)

The part that I didn't like was that he was trying to make small talk when this critical process was going on, like asking me how long I have been in the area etc,...I was like DUUUUDE!!! Just get it over with and then we can talk all you want...OK?

I launched the offensive next...and equally flatly (as in with no emotion) asked him if there was a need for a DIGITAL exam. He said that since my family didn't have a history of cancer, there was no need to do it until I was 40....WAHOOOOOO!!!!! Sweet Jesus, I bought another 6 years of time!!

I was cool with that....and so in the end, it wasn't nearly as bad as I'd anticipated it to be...my uni-directional valve can stay that way for some more time and all is well with the world! :-)

Review of Happyness

Good movie....somewhat slow and painful path to a triumphant end....definitely worth seeing once...

dont go if you are feeling goofy, a little light-headed and/or are drunk!

need to write more....I know...but am feeling too sleepy yaar!

Will update this one soon....I promise! :-)

Update: Thought some more about what I'd like to write about this movie....I think my first 2 sentences complete the review quite nicely! So that's it.... adios!

Oh Come on!!!! For Chrissakes!!! Dont tag me you SOB!

Hmmm....that wasn't me saying it....that was a hummingbird. Yup, you heard that right...I'm not blinking now, am I? :-)

Heard on the WRAL news this evening that a migratory hummingbird while flying south stopped for a break and that happened to be the governor's house or something like that....it was shown to be sitting (pretty docilely might I add) in the palms of the first lady of the state. The first lady released it and it flew away to its destination....probably in the West Indies or so.

I believe that the scientists were all over it and even tagged it so it could be studied and its route marked etc,. Apparently they've been doing this for thousandsof these birds...

Now, up until I heard that last statement, I was OK....I mean, the first lady never gets on the news....so good opportunity for some press etc,. I get all that...no issues there...BUT!!!

Let's now talk some simple numbers here...the WEIGHT of the "tag" that the scientists put on the leg of the hummingbird was...well, lets say 1 gram. that's not too much is it? Well, if you consider that most species of humming birds that are out there weigh between 3 and 4 grams, that's 25 to 33 % of their body weight EXTRA that they're carrying...what would you say if you were the hummingbird? :-)

Scientists also pointed out that a large percentage of hummingbirds dont live beyond the first year. A small percentage live their full life of 3 years...I wonder why?
a. Scientists TAG them poor things, so they have to lug around all that extra weight.
b. With a total weight of 3 grams, I'm sure there is a severe aerodynamic drag/shift on the flights - to the point that if they set the course towards the Caribbean, they end up in California!

Just by chance, if the species "tagged" turned out to be the "bee hummingbird" - that little guy weighs 1.8 grams....I think he would resign himself to fate, just refuse to fly and stab himself with his beak! :-)

Some more interesting facts while I was researching this topic...

1. They flap their wings (typically) at the rate of 55 beats per second....during courtship dives, have been recorded at upto 80 bps!
2. Heart rate for a blue-throated hummingbird has been clocked at 1250 beats per minute!!! and the resting heart rate is about 250 per minute. Torpid (sort of hibernating) birds clock between 50 and 180 bpm....talk about a well-oiled engine!
3. They normally eat their body weight every day.....nectar, sugar syrups and small insects for protein!

Hmmm......it's things like this that makes me believe that there is God! Such a creation can not be an accident...

11:40 pm and it's time to go to bed...this God's creation is too damn tired to type.....I'm not sure if I'll sleep easy....too many thoughts of hummingbirds running (err...flying) around in my head. Adios!

Too frickin' good!! :-)

Too funny!! I was surfing along on Dilbert's website....and found this gem of a mission statement generator! I'm sure there are a number of companies that have lifted this straight-up from Mr. Adams "Mission Statement Generator".

Some quotes por favor:

We have committed to seamlessly promote excellent meta-services in order that we may professionally provide access to progressive infrastructures in order to solve business problems.

It is our business to conveniently disseminate enterprise-wide leadership skills to stay competitive in tomorrow's world.

We exist to seamlessly provide access to diverse benefits to allow us to dramatically pursue parallel products.

I know I'm acting like a little kid who's discovered his favorite little game.....but it's too good to not share!

Thank you Scott for making my otherwise dull gloomy and rainy sunday here in Raleigh, NC.

P.S. - Cannot believe that this guy even sells food! Initially, I thought it was a joke.....but noooooooooooooooo! Please visit Dilberito.com for details!