"Run-in" with "THE MAN"
Arrived at the Philadelphia airport on Friday evening and had a "run-in" with the immigration official....it's not like you have much of a choice really....we all have to go through "THE MAN" before you are out free. This particular one was more interesting as the officer in this case was of Chinese Origin.
The conversation was as follows:
DS Says: Good Afternoon!
THE MAN: An unmentionable sound that was a cross between clearing his throat, a gargle and blowing his nose...all at the same time.
THE MAN: Why are you here?
DS Thinks: What the fuck? Why dont you check my current address in my I-94 and my fricking visa classification?
DS Says: I live here in Raleigh, NC.
THE MAN GRUNTS: Any proof of that?
DS Says: I can show you my Driver's Licence.
THE MAN: No need. What have you brought with you? Cigarettes, Liquor, Drugs, Diamonds? What?
DS Thinks: Are you immigration or Customs? Why dont you just be clear what "hat" you are wearing today?
DS Says: None.
THE MAN Condescendingly: None? HA! Then what did you bring? Food? Plants? Seeds? Indian Spices? Curry? Mangoes? HUH?
DS Thinks: Hey Fucktard! Do you see where I am coming from? From Madrid!!
DS Says: None...you see I'm coming from Madrid, so....
THE MAN furiously scribbles some numbers from my visa to the I-94 etc,.
THE MAN Interrupting: OK OK OK...Go that way.
De-Silva and De-Silvi walk away towards Customs....where a man just takes one quick look at the customs forms and says Thank You - Please proceed this way.
I must thank Russel Peters here....all I had to do to feel better was to imagine how Russel would have role played the situation and suddenly it transformed from one of irritation to one of pure bliss....I actually felt a lot better! :-)
Interestingly enough, and on a more serious note, if you look at the glossy posters there, they all state that every person passing through the immigration and customs secions at airports will be treated with compassion, respect and dignity. The websites linked to these departments state the same. I know for a fact that I am not an isolated case among the thousands who pass through everyday.
In my past travels, I have met some really good immigration officers who have gone about their job in a thorough and professional manner....but as in any walk of life, I chalk this one up to a case of a bad apple...and continue on...
posted by De-Silva | 10/01/2006 11:03:00 AM
4 Comments:
LOL - you should have told him to "Be a man"
that would have been awesome ;)
-venky
Thirty four - fifty......that would have been a dead give-away and my ass would be on the next plane back to India on some trumped up charges!! :-)
I concur with you mate - one wise-ass colleague of mine tried to explain UK visa rules to the UK immigration officer- needless to the say the officer was pissed and the giy was let out after a lot of phone calls between the immigration officer and our office.
Personally I always end up having pleasant conversations with them. of course I am always clean shaven on international flights.
BAH!!! Brij bhai.....was the reference to "the clean shaven" bit made on comparison to your wise-ass colleague or me? Coz this time when I came went to / came back from Spain, I had shaved off my beard!! the usual desi non-confrontational moustache was ass I sported....
oh well...if it is your day then even fate cannot intervene I suppose....
Cheers.
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